Sunday, August 5, 2012


It's been a while since I've blogged anything. Been a little too busy I guess. But watching Z and Lee bond in the garage I thought I'd post real quick.
Z is a HUGE help in the garage . (just ask him).
If tools are laying in a pile while fixing a project, Z will take them and put them away for you! (not necessarily in the right places and usually before you're done)
If there's a can of nuts and bolts nearby, Z will dump them all over the floor. (to make it easier to find the one you need)
If the air hose is down ,Z has learned to pull on it and the nifty thing will quickly roll right back up on the roller. (doesn't matter if you were still using it, can't have hoses laying around)
If floor dry is needed Z makes sure it is evenly and completely spread all around the garage. (he believes you can never use too much floor dry)
Z also finds the garage a GREAT place for tricycle riding. This way he can quickly supervise all the work and help as needed. 
If Z sees Lee hammer something, Z will hammer something next. If Z sees Lee use a screwdriver, Z must use one etc. etc. The ONLY unfortunate thing is that little fingers often drop tools and bolts and things in places where they don't belong. (like inside a motor or under a porch)
Z watches Lee change tires on the tire machine, so when Z goes to change his tires on his matchbox somehow accidentally ended up on the INSIDE of the tire machine! (no worries Lee got it out).
If you need any help in your garage just let me know and I will send the super mechanic Z right over!

Thursday, May 3, 2012

Couldn't have said it better!

10 Surefire Ways to End a Friendship with a Foster Parenting Friend

By , Guide

Yes, I’m only kidding with the following suggestions, unless of course you do want to lose your foster parenting friend. But these are statements that I, and many of my foster parent friends, have personally heard from other well-meaning friends and family. I know hurting me or my family was not intended, but I do hope that through this article others can see how simple statements can have an impact on others.
  1. Tell your foster parenting friends how you could never do foster care because you would love the children too much. This way the foster family feels a bit cold-hearted as that is the only way anyone could do foster care, according to your statement.
  2. Bug the foster family with questions about why the children are not with their birth mom and dad. This is a great way to push the foster family into breaking confidentiality and ruining their reputation as a professional part of the foster care team.
  3. Advise the foster family that the foster child just needs a good spanking to solve behavior problems. The foster family will then feel further overwhelmed not only in dealing with behaviors, but in constantly having to explain and defend discipline choices.
  4. Devalue the foster family's choice to serve the children of the community by criticizing their decision. Explain how you would never do foster care because it brings bad influences into your home and into the lives of your children.
  5. Say things like, "you're too strict", "all foster children need is love," and "you should baby the kids more, they've been through so much" undermining the foster parent's ability to make parenting choices for the children within their care.
  6. Refuse to understand the need for the children to have boundaries within relationships and triangulate with the kids every chance you get. Try siding with the kids against the foster parents, they love this!
  7. When the foster parent is venting to you as one of their much needed support systems, say, “I’ve never seen the foster child act like that, he/she was perfect for me,” or “I would take him/her in a minute if I could.” This will cause the foster parent to think that they are going crazy and doubt what they are seeing in the child’s behavior.
  8. If the foster child drives you crazy then feel free to tell the foster parents about it. Don’t worry about saying anything rude about the child within their care, it’s not like they are the foster child's REAL parents anyway. Say things like, “how can you stand that kid?” “ I would have shipped him/her off long ago.” Be sure to complain about the child every chance you get, ignoring any hint of hurt from the foster parent.
  9. Drive home any feelings of ineptness by telling the foster parents how you’d have “that kid straightened out in two weeks." Nothing makes a foster parent feel unsuccessful like comparison of parenting skills. This will cause the foster parents to doubt their parenting ability and to second guess every choice and decision.
  10. Guilt is a very effective tool if you want to destroy someone’s self-worth. Ask the foster parents if they feel terrible about taking away from their own children with their choice of doing foster care. This is even more effective during times of high stress when the foster child is having behavior problems and the family is in crisis mode.
If you follow these 10 easy steps you too could end a perfectly good friendship with your pal who does foster care! If, however, you value this friendship and your friend - try the opposite of each of the above statements. I bet your foster parenting friend will appreciate it

Monday, April 23, 2012


WOW! My life has become a whirlwind of excitement! My nephew Braden made his grand appearance into the world last Sunday, April 15th...(yes my accountant sister had her first child on tax day!) AND HE IS WONDERFUL!
As for the foster kids,
J has become increasingly aggressive and confused. We took them to another foster home for the weekend so we could host a rock crawling event for Lee's birthday. The other foster mom said they were the most hyper kids she'd ever seen, and she has a birth child with ADHD. J gets in trouble at preschool almost every day. The first calls I get from school are PRE-school. I can only imagine what regular school will be like if things don't change. Ironically, even though he gets in a lot of trouble, he LOVES preschool. We started counseling and the "123 magic" program that the counselor recommended. So prayers are appreciated while we deal with new challenges every day.
K is doing pretty well. She's a bit confused and a big copy-cat of big brother, but she's quickly getting to where she needs to be socially and academically.
Sometimes the frustrations are intense , but so is the cuteness. Like today we stopped by to see my mom at work and K and J were "helping" clean windows. Now they were getting more prints on the windows than off, but the effort was there! They also help (and I use the word help loosely) sweep, mop, and vacuum the house! They are learning to pray before we eat. J can say a whole prayer it goes like this...every time..".Dear God, Thank you for food. In Jesus name Amen." Doesn't matter if he's praying in church or at the dinner table, this is his prayer! K mumbles a few words and says Amen....but sometimes she does it before every single bite! (She's very thankful sometimes lol)
It's difficult, yes. But nobody ever said it would be easy. The things worth doing rarely are. The thing that bothers me perhaps the most, even more than the behavior issues, is the fact that  if  I had a dollar for every person that has already told me it's time to give up on these kids, I could probably retire right now.  

Monday, April 2, 2012

Chaos VS Cuteness

WOW!!! I must admit foster parenting is MUCH harder than I thought! We have moments of cuteness mixed in with moments of chaos and there's NEVER a dull moment....EVER. My patience is being tested like never before!  But just when I am about to reach the end of my rope, they do something cute. because even though the chaos never ends, neither does the cuteness! Here's some examples:
1- I walk in the bedroom and K has emptied her ENTIRE dresser of clothes out on the floor. I ask her why she did that and she sweetly replies "I was looking for socks"
2- Breakfast turns to chaos when K spills on her clothes, strips down and runs across the table in her undies.  All while I am on the phone trying to conduct buisness.
3- But they are getting it slowly. after about 20 times of saying "K you're too big for Ty's baby swing, get out of it" I catch her in it again. Before I can say anything she looks at me and says (in her sweetest voice) "I too big" and gets down.....
4- And they behaved well enough in the bank that the ladies gave them stickers!!! Then while I was watching the road in the minivan , they placed the stickers on my sidewindows!
5- J wanted to help water the animals so I explained that we only spray water in the water buckets not on people or animals. First he sprayed the deer bucket til it was full. Then he sprayed water in the chicken bucket til it was full, then he sprayed the neighbor boy, and then he sprayed me. Not just a little, I was soaked. And J was in time-out. Haley did seem to enjoy the show from the trampoline where she was jumping, as she was laughing hysterically when we got back up to the house! I told J what he did was not funny and she must be laughing at something else!
6-K walks in the office and grabs the picture of Lee that I keep on my desk and says "Look it's the best daddy ever"  (If only she knew this daddy was about ready to pull his hair out !)
7-Church is an all-out circus in our pew, as it seems to be a new experience for J and K. Quiet is hard for them. Being still is even harder. Sitting down for more than 5 minutes is hardest of all.  We established a new rule ---If we have to go outside and get a time-out in church then we dont play on the playground after church---This new rule caused K to scream all the way home last night "I NEED THE PARK".
I find myself saying unexpected things all the time such as "that's not a ball it's a potatoe" and "we dont dance in the bathtub, we sit", and " the kitchen cabinets are not for climbing on".  Actually the only reason I had time to even blog was because K decided to watch Mickey Mouse for a few minutes and I was on hold with the fuel card people ! 


Saturday, March 24, 2012


Well it finally happened. We have foster children. Yes in more than one. One boy & one girl to be exact. Referred by my good friend Amanda Cousins to her case worker, we got a call . It was Friday afternoon. All our children were spending the weekend with their other parents for spring break. We were planning a kid-free weekend and Saturday date night . I was on my way to the grocery store. And then we got the call. A sibling group of 2 needs a foster home immediately. So we talked and decided to take them. I was asked to meet a caseworker at DHS and pick them up since I was close to town. I wait in the office for what seems like forever then she brings in 2 of the most adorable, hyper kids I have ever seen! I have learned a few things about foster parenting already:
1--Nobody thats sane does it
2--Kids may not come to you scared and crying , they may come to you bouncing off the walls and into everything
3-Bedtime can be crazy
4- Grocery shopping can be much crazier than bedtime
5- Some kids are afraid of nobody and when you tell them to hold on to the cart and dont let go ,so you don't lose them in the store, it may not be YOUR cart they grab onto.
6--A three year old can climb a wall...a straight up and down wall or bathtub side
7--There is no good answer for "Where's mommy"
8--Pull-ups are very absorbent, but not so much that they will absorb a washing machine full of water if one is accidentally washed. It will explode. All over your load of clothes. And it will be near impossible to clean out of the washer. 
Good news I no longer need a diet or exercise plan. Cause I don't have time to eat or rest any longer. LOL  Love these kids though. Tomorrow...we attempt church with fosters!

Tuesday, March 20, 2012


 In preparation for the lady from DHS to come and approve our house for foster care , I once again cleaned everything to the extreme! I locked down anything sharp or remotely toxic. I cleaned out the deer pen and chicken coop, Scrubbed everything that can be scrubbed in the house, got laundry caught up, kitchen clean, and then i cooked dinner, and then I cleaned the kitchen all over again, swept, mopped, vacuumed etc.
Well the DHS lady showed up yesterday and officially opened our home for foster children.  She didn't look at the animals at all, she took a quick walk around the house and handed us a binder. Now instead of impatiently waiting to be open, I am impatiently waiting for a phone call to accept a child. Did I mention patience is not my strong suit? 
Nonetheless we have a lot to be excited about in the very near future.
#1---hopefully we will be adding a foster child to our family very soon
#2--My nephew Braden is about ready to be born! 
Waiting for both calls any day now!!!!! 
Anyone care to guess which call I get first?

Saturday, March 10, 2012

The BABY shower!!!!!

I have learned several things while preparing a baby shower for my sister. I had a lot of fun planning it , so I am passing on my new knowledge to all of you readers out there. Yes all 3 of you ! LOL 
#1- Ducks can float in water-colored punch (although not constantly upright!) So if you do one of these watch for occasional drowning duckies!
#2 Ducks fit on a cake nicely too.(they stayed upright here!) And for those of you who assume I had the talent to make this cake...I did not...It's a Harps! Of course don't expect Harps to have it done on time or anything.......but thats another story!
#3 Ducks can even fit right in a diaper cake! (Thank to April for this one)
 #4- If life throws a curve at you in the middle of the planning...friends and family show up to help make it all happen! (Again, Thanks April, and thanks mom too)
#5- If you plan a baby shower from 2:00-5:00, but find you're done at 3:45 and everyones started should still expect a 4:00 to 4:30  crowd ! LOL ....My apologies to the after 4:00 people for having locked the doors, but I did enjoy our visit outside!
#6--if you have the party at Carroll WILL sweep, mop, take out the trash, and clean windows and doors before leaving if you want your deposit back! And if someone leaves prints on the glass door 3 separate times after they were cleaned clean them again!  This is the point I am glad I had children, as they came in very handy for #6. 
#7-- The amount of help (with the party), support (for my sister), and welcoming excitement (for baby Braden) makes it so worth it!!!!
And just in case my sister kills me for posting that last picture, know that I love you all!!!!! And thanks for reading! (and by the way sis you're so cute pregnant!)